Embracing your authentic self: The Journey to true Beauty
In a world constantly bombarding us with messages about how we should look, act, and feel, the journey to embracing our authentic self becomes not just an act of rebellion but a profound act of self-love. The concept of the 'authentic self' is deeply rooted in understanding and accepting who we truly are, beyond societal norms and expectations.
I am in my truck a lot for work, like, 500 miles a week, a lot. I use this time to further my learning or catch up on “reading” or listening to podcasts. While listening to a recent episode of Sinisterhood (shameless plug) one line jumped out at me. “When you are always on stage then who are you really”?
My theme for 2024 is The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz and I have been thinking heavily about the 2nd agreement. “Don’t Take Things Personally”. The line in the podcast sent me into tailspin of thought about living life on stage and what it means to me to not take things personally. Am I living life as my authentic self? Who am I really? How does one get down to their authentic selves and how do we know when we are there?
I will attempt to asnwer some of these questions here.
The Mask of Perfection
From a young age, especially as women, we are taught to wear a mask of perfection. This mask is polished by societal standards, some may say “the patriarchy”– a façade that dictates we must always appear flawless, composed, and perpetually balanced. But beneath this mask, lies our true selves – raw, imperfect, and beautifully unique.
The algorithm of the Universe works in mysterious ways. I have been receiving messages of embracing my authentic self across so many platforms in the last few weeks. To this point, I have wanted to see the Barbie movie since it was released earlier this year. For whatever reason, my plans to watch were thwarted on multiple occasions. The Universe wanted me to see the movie at a particular time. In Divine time, right when I was chewing on the concept of “authentic self”.
In the movie, America Ferrara delivers an incredible monologue. It had it’s intended effect and moved me deeply (as I hope it did for all the women watching). This monologue delivers my message so beautifully I had to share it here:
It is literally impossible to be a woman. You are so beautiful, and so smart, and it kills me that you don't think you're good enough. Like, we have to always be extraordinary, but somehow we're always doing it wrong.
You have to be thin, but not too thin. And you can never say you want to be thin. You have to say you want to be healthy, but also you have to be thin. You have to have money, but you can't ask for money because that's crass. You have to be a boss, but you can't be mean. You have to lead, but you can't squash other people's ideas. You're supposed to love being a mother, but don't talk about your kids all the damn time. You have to be a career woman but also always be looking out for other people.
You have to answer for men's bad behavior, which is insane, but if you point that out, you're accused of complaining. You're supposed to stay pretty for men, but not so pretty that you tempt them too much or that you threaten other women because you're supposed to be a part of the sisterhood.
But always stand out and always be grateful. But never forget that the system is rigged. So find a way to acknowledge that but also always be grateful.
You have to never get old, never be rude, never show off, never be selfish, never fall down, never fail, never show fear, never get out of line. It's too hard! It's too contradictory and nobody gives you a medal or says thank you! And it turns out in fact that not only are you doing everything wrong, but also everything is your fault.
I'm just so tired of watching myself and every single other woman tie herself into knots so that people will like us. And if all of that is also true for a doll just representing women, then I don't even know.
The Power of Letting Go: Am I living Life as my authentic self?
The first step towards embracing your authentic self is letting go. Letting go of the fear of judgment, the need for external validation, and the incessant quest for perfection. When we start peeling off these layers, what emerges is our true essence – unfiltered and unapologetic.
As a teen and into my early 20’s I had bulimia. Research has shown that bulimia is a disease that gives the illusion of control. When I felt like life was out of control, my bulimia came in to rescue me. Another aspect of the disease is the constant feeling of being judged for not being thin enough (good enough, smart enough, enough). While I recovered from the binge and purge cycle, I was left with the constant feeling of being on stage, being judged for my appearance and actions. This of course is all perceived but feels really, really real!
This section could be a complete blog post in itself but in the interest of TLDR, I’ll get to the point. No one is watching you, no one is judging you, they are too busy feeling like they are on stage and being judged. Let it go and set yourself free. Allow yourself to just be. Be Limitless.
The Second Agreement: A Beacon of Who am I really?
In the profound book "The Four Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz, the second agreement, "Don't take anything personally," serves as a beacon of liberation. It teaches us that the opinions and actions of others are a reflection of their own realities, not ours. When we internalize this, the chains of judgment and self-doubt start to weaken.
I am an incredibly shy introvert. I would much rather be at home on my couch then out peopleing. But am I? The more I step into my authentic self and let go of perceived judgement, the more I enjoy being around people! In social situations I often stay quiet and become a part of the supporting cast because I am afraid of what would happen if I allowed myself to be a main player. The interesting result of this choice is that I come off as judgemental and others feel that I think I am better than them. I HAD NO IDEA!!!!!
Perception is such a funny thing. Break those chains and take a chance on letting others see who you are! I promise you, they are just as afraid as you are.
Authentic Self and Holistic Skincare: How do I know when I get to my authentic self?
As the owner of Funk N Fresh Farm & Apothecary, I've seen firsthand how embracing one's authentic self is intertwined with holistic skincare. Skincare is not just about treating the surface; it's a ritual of self-care that nurtures both the skin and the soul. When we care for ourselves holistically, we're honoring our authentic self.
We probably can’t ever know “when” we get there but we can act “as if” and practice rituals that support our healing journey. Skincare is self-care. It is the act of loving and honoring our selves. When we use the time we set aside for our skincare routine and turn it into a self-care ritual, we develop a daily practice of nurturing our authentic self. That is when we get there.
The Sacred Skincare Philosophy
In Sacred Skincare, we emphasize the sacred act of self-care. It's a celebration of the beauty within, which naturally enhances the beauty on the outside. Our approach combines natural ingredients with embodiment practices, encouraging a deeper connection with oneself.
Sacred Skincare supports you in making choices that resonate with your true values and desires. It's about listening to your intuition and trusting your journey. It's also about being kind to yourself, recognizing that the path to authenticity is a journey, not a destination.
Embracing Imperfection
Part of embracing our authentic self is accepting our imperfections. It's understanding that flaws are not weaknesses but aspects that make us uniquely who we are. In our imperfections, we find our individuality and strength.
When we embrace our imperfection, when we allow ourselves to be limitless, we stand as a beacon for others to do the same. In finding our authentic self, we allow others to embrace their authentic self.
Living authentically has a profound impact on our mental and emotional well-being. It fosters self-confidence, inner peace, and a deep sense of fulfillment. When we are true to ourselves, we attract experiences and relationships that align with our genuine selves.
Conclusion: Your Authentic Journey
Embracing your authentic self is a courageous journey. It's a path filled with self-discovery, growth, and an abundance of self-love. As you embark on this journey, remember, your authentic self is your greatest gift to the world. It's the essence of true beauty and confidence.
At Funk N Fresh Farm & Apothecary, we are dedicated to supporting you on this journey. Through our holistic skincare rituals and practices, we aim to help you nurture not just your skin but your soul – guiding you towards a life lived authentically and beautifully.
Stay Radiant!